For others.

Bom Dia! Today I am going site finding, as I do everyday, with Adriano, my teammate from Brazil. I have renewed hope that we will find sites today. We only found three last week and I was getting down on myself about that. I think this is natural, business to business sales is not my gig, but I am challenging myself to meet the resistance I feel on and off the cushion. I think my schpiel was all wrong and that is why I kept getting so many 'no's' last week. I sat down and journaled about it and came up with a newer, more personal schpiel. Hopefully that works better. I recognize that as soon as I get a 'no', I walk out of the door. I know sales people don't take 'no' for an answer so there is the thing I am working with: the belief that what I have to offer is great and no one should turn down the chance to recycle and when I believe, other's believe...this is my theory anyway.

Things at the house are things at the house. Some roommates are getting on each other's nerves because they're not cleaning, (it's not me this time!). I am smoothing the waters with understanding where I can, working directly with the person's anger. My approach is to ask them to, just for the moment, see if the anger they feel is helping anyone and then asking what the solution would be if there were no anger. The last couple of days this has helped. I know I cannot keep anger out of the house entirely but if I can lend what I have learned, I am happy to do so as I benefit from this also. I read that if I truly want to help end the suffering of all beings, the most realistic thing to do is to start with my immediate environment and work my way out from there. Ah, moment of clarity!

I wrote a small letter to each of my teammates and my two bosses, opening the communication between us a little wider and appreciating thier character(s). Oddly, I felt really raw afterward. I felt like they might think I was silly for making an attempt or that I had given something they did not not want. It was fear. It was fear because this is new, this doing for others, simply to do for others. As a Warrior for love, compassion, joy, and equanimity, I have to be daring. I have to be willing to take initiative and trust my intellignet actions as they arrise in my head. I kind of just got the message and acted on it, only later to be scolded by my ego. This is good, I knew to trust the action. More so, I knew to trust myself:)

Wish me luck today, as I 'jump in, both feet'!